One fine day in early Spring I bought myself a bag. A lovely leather satchel, purchased from our local charity shop, I mean boutique, from whence I get most of my treasures, clothes and junk. It was one of those really lucky finds – I couldn’t believe it was in a charity shop. Big smile.



On the bus home I surveyed my booty and was intrigued by the word ‘Cybher’ embossed on its luminous yellow front. A quick snoop online led me straight to the Cyhber bloggers conference. Seeing as this was around the time that I embarked on this blog of self-discovery and new beginnings, it was clearly meant to be. So naturally I enrolled. Immediate excitement.

And now Cybher has finally rolled around. It’s this Saturday…

Cybher badge

So right now, this minute, I’d like to be writing about my growing excitement and deliberating about the outfit I’m going to wear (as many others are), but instead this is what you get from me:

Since booking my place at Cybher I’ve thrown myself around on an oh-so familiar roller coaster of destructive thoughts about going – I won’t know anyone, everyone else will be online savvy, super cool and younger/prettier/sharper/wittier than me. Should I even go?

…in a situation like this you can rely on me to imagine the worst case scenario in vivid detail – its one of my greatest creative skills you know.

Why do we do this to ourselves? Tie ourselves up in knots and focus on ALL the things that might go wrong, however UNlikely, while forgetting or choosing not to consider the things that will probably, almost certainly, definitely be great. Of course fear is a crucial emotion with a vital purpose. It prepares us for danger and prevents us from throwing ourselves into perilous situations. But this is an exciting women’s blogging conference, not a tank full of hungry sharks!

I’d like to think that by now, in my middle years, I’d have shaken off fruitless fears like this and be focussed instead on the really important things in life, like my fambily and enjoying life. Our cat has it sussed – I often look at her and wonder at her wisdom. She might have a small brain but she focusses it on all the most important things. Food, comfort and sleep, basically!

And note that my Cybher bag matches the kitchen. Natch.

And note that my Cybher bag matches the kitchen. Double delight!

I’d like to be able to say that I no longer worry about such things as Saturday, but that’s not how it is. Not yet anyway. No, unfortunately I still do worry; too much. My brain continues to work overtime on matters that it should not concern itself with.

So my current tactic is to question these automatic thoughts – the negative ones that spring up without any encouragement. I am trying to challenge their validity. Exactly when did that worst case scenario ever come true?

I’ve been helped on this occasion by social media, Twitter in particular. Who’d have thought? Well not me 6 months ago. Following @Cybher on Twitter I have learned that of course there are other first timers and that there are other nervous delegates. Sharing our fears in little bite-sized pieces has been very helpful as has tw(m)eeting beforehand and it has made me realise how mad we all are to dwell on negative thoughts.

All of this online social media lark has been such a fascinating learning curve and attending Cybher has already opened my eyes about the virtual social world, and I haven’t even got there yet! I wrote here only last week that I might not blog for much longer. I hope though that I might come away from Saturday full of ideas of how to continue writing a blog that is relevant. If not, it will be the right time to stop.

In any event I am pedalling fast towards Cybher Day now. On Saturday morning I’ll be lurking round a corner with a coffee, hiding before I go in. Either that or I’ll be running horribly late due to a last minute fashion crisis, because come the day I will still have NO idea what to wear. But either way I WILL be there. And I sincerely hope that all the other worriers are there too.

Meanwhile my phone is pinging beside me with new tweets. So while I’d normally be happy to continue analysing the inside of my head, I shall sign off now and get back to the important matter of virtual pre-meets. Hello Cybher and fellow Cybherites, one and all. I look forward to meeting you. Honest!

A tiny piece of guerilla street art

A tiny piece of guerilla street art to end with…

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17 Responses to “Serendipity”

  1. Claire @ Bad Fiction Says:

    Love it! And I am loving your green shelves! I have shelf envy! x

  2. Geekisnewchic Says:

    Amazing. It was simply meant to be.

  3. Joanne Mallon Says:

    Wow what an amazing story. Though my jaw dropped at the thought of somebody giving a Cybher bag to the charity shop, those things are precious. But obviously it was meant for you. Hope to see you on Saturday. I will be there with my daughter – here we are

    • eethree Says:

      I know that was my thought too. How could they! But treasure indeed for me. Looking forward to meeting you both tomorrow – I watched your vid – lovely!

  4. lizzy Says:

    I just think it will be a really interesting meeting. I would love to be a fly on the wall.

  5. squirrelsonthehill Says:

    Oh good luck to you, and have fun! It is always hard to do new things, and self-confidence is something that I am always trying to improve upon in myself. I am sure that it will be a good experience for you!

    • eethree Says:

      Thank you, that’s very kind. It has been made so much easier by the virtual chat and support beforehand. As you say I think many of us feel unconfident at times, so to be reminded that we are not alone is really valuable…

  6. pinkoddy Says:

    Well you are definitely not going to give up blogging when you write such great posts as that. Obviously fate that the bag found you!
    Thank you so much for making me feel less nervous about attending and I look forward to seeing you there.

  7. rachel Says:

    And how was it? …..x

    • eethree Says:

      Great, really great thanks Rachel. Will post on it soon but girls have inset day today and sun is out so will have to be later!

  8. geekisnewchic Says:

    I had to come back to say how lovely it was to meet you on Saturday. I hope you continue to blog and that our friendship grows. x

    • eethree Says:

      Well thanks to the amazing day you organised on Saturday I am definitely carrying on blogging. I came away really inspired and happy. I’m trying to write a post right now but am finding it really hard to pull all together with any coherence – apart from to say it was just brilliant. And that’s far too short! I hope you recognise the impact Cybher 2013 has had on a LOT of people. Amazing. Thank you so much.

  9. Cybher 2013. A grand day out… | eethree Says:

    […] A new life in middle life in London E3 « Serendipity […]

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